California Governor Debate Descends Into Chaos As Katie Porter Dumps Scalding Mashed Potatoes On Moderators

MONTEREY PARK, CA — A heated debate between the candidates for governor of California descended into mayhem last night after Katie Porter dumped an entire pot of scalding mashed potatoes on the moderators' heads. Witnesses said the incident occurred roughly forty-three minutes into the debate when moderators attempted to ask Porter about repeated allegations of her abusing staff and family members. "You want to play that game with me?? Have a taste!" shouted Porter, producing an industrial-sized stock pot filled with boiling hot potatoes. "I'm going to melt those lips together so that you can never open your mouth...