3 weeks ago
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‘I would pop them like sweets,’ says Caitlin Atkins, 32. ‘I had built up such a tolerance that taking the tablets wouldn’t even do anything, they’d just make me feel normal.’
The mum-of-one, from Birmingham, was just 16 when she started taking opioids.
While opioid addiction in the USA is widely documented, dramatised in the hit series Dopesick, it’s a significant issue in the UK too. Latest ONS figures show that the number of drug poisonings from opiates are up by 21% in the last five years.
Battling ‘tummy issues’ in her teens, Caitlin was 16 when she was diagnosed with polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS).
‘I was admitted to hospital where I was given tramadol for the first time,’ says Caitlin. ‘It did start with a legitimate health issue.’
She also began to take codeine phosphate to manage her pain, and Caitlin says that ‘within months’ she was taking her monthly dose within just two to three days: ‘It didn’t take me long to start abusing my prescriptions,’ she admits.
‘As my painkiller addiction went on, there were times I told lies that I was in some sort of pain.
‘The doctors were becoming aware of the fact I was saying I was losing prescriptions.’
By 2015, aged just 21, her tolerance to painkillers was so high, that she turned to heroin, where she’d spend up to £1,000 a day.
‘[A friend] introduced me to heroin but with that heroin use it commonly comes with crack cocaine use,’ Caitlin explainers.
‘It was through crack cocaine and heroin I began hanging around with not very nice people. I’d have black eyes and issues with dealers and it was absolute chaos.’
Caitlin recounts how she begged family members for money and used her benefits to fund her addiction, admitting she felt ‘numb and broken’ to it all.
Opioids and addiction
The NHS warns patients not to take medicines that contain codeine with tramadol due to being ‘more likely to get side effects’.
Codeine and tramadol are a form of opioid and the NHS warn that they’re addictive and doses should be reviewed.
The NHS estimated in 2021 that over one million people in England were prescribed opioids such as codeine and tramadol for more than three months.
This can result in long-term dependence, physical and mental health issues, or even death from accidental overdoses or heart conditions resulting from side effects.
You can find out more at: https://www.england.nhs.uk/long-read/reducing-long-term-opioid-use/
In May 2017, desperate to find a ‘better life’ for herself, Caitlin moved to Lanzarote, but this only worsened her addiction. She says she’d take 56 co-co-codamol tablets a day, which she was able to get from a private doctor.
Caitlin said: ‘I moved over there to change and better my life. But I came back more addicted to drugs than I was when I left.’
Caitlin worked as a waitress but says she doesn’t know how she ‘managed it’, and remembers ‘dropping things a lot.’
‘I thought, where I was living at home, I thought the problems were associated with the people and the area and not with me.
‘I thought if I picked myself up and changed my location things would be fine and dandy.’
In December of that year, Caitlin’s family brought her home.
‘My dad and my aunt had to fly out to get me. One of the guys that worked in the hostel messaged [my mum] and said “if somebody doesn’t come out and get her she’s going to die”.
Worried about drugs?
Frank offers confidential advice about drugs and addiction (email [email protected], message 82111 or call 0300 123 6600) or the NHS has information about getting help.
Adfam has local groups for families affected by drugs and alcohol and DrugFam offers phone and email support to people affected by other people's drug or alcohol misuse.
‘They flew out to come and get me and I had to be sedated to come back home.
‘That was probably the most unwell I’d ever been, physically mentally and psychologically. It was really scary.’
Despite completing a twelve-week rehab course in 2021, Caitlin relapsed.
But then, in 2022, she fell pregnant.
Caitlin says she remembers thinking: ‘This is a whole life that is going to be impacted by the decisions I make.’
Discussing her son, she said he ‘changed my whole entire life.
‘I had to make better choices and it was a really turbulent time.’
It was the motivation Caitlin needed to get clean. She hasn’t used drugs since falling pregnant.
‘My son has saved me in so many ways and it was never his job to save me, he’s changed my whole entire life,’ says Caitlin.
‘Don’t get me wrong, it’s not easy at times. Being a parent and a mother has been so self-worth building for me and I just love that.’
Encouraging other addicts to be open about their experiences, Caitlin is sharing hope for others like her:
‘There is a way out and there’s hope, seek help and go there.’
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Bengali (Bangladesh) · 
English (United States) ·